Woman Breaks Into Car to Sleep, Sets it on Fire, Can’t Find Unlock Button

Man oh man. Have you ever went to pick up a friend at night and they go to get into your car but the door is locked, so you fumble around trying to find the unlock button? It usually takes a few seconds, and your friend thinks you’re trying to be cute and they annoyingly knock on the window like you don’t actually see them standing there trying to get into the car.

ANYWAY. The point of that is that you usually find your way to the unlock button. Continue reading “Woman Breaks Into Car to Sleep, Sets it on Fire, Can’t Find Unlock Button”

“I’m Way Too Drunk to do Any of That Walking!” Man Respectfully Declines Field Sobriety Test

Sometimes you just have to fall on Mercy Street and hope the cop will give you a warning or a break. The cop will ask if you’ve been drinking, and you decide to be honest and tell them you’ve had a few, but you’re almost home…yada yada yada. And sometimes, this actually works. Continue reading ““I’m Way Too Drunk to do Any of That Walking!” Man Respectfully Declines Field Sobriety Test”

Man Leaves Phone Recording On Counter In Walmart Bathroom

Brazen. That’s the word I’d use to describe this man who left his phone perched upright and backwards against a bathroom mirror, recording the goings on in the women’s Walmart bathroom.

Give the guy credit, I guess. He had balls big enough to think that he could somehow get away with this.

Tip for him next time: Maybe don’t use your personal phone and if you have to, maybe take the child porn pics and pictures of yourself off of it before hand…or at the very least LOCK IT? Continue reading “Man Leaves Phone Recording On Counter In Walmart Bathroom”

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Man Attacks Gas Station Clerk with Hot Dogs and a Corn Dog Stick

Anything for a cold beer, amirite? Apparently that rings true for this gem of a guy who turned into MacGyver when a gas station attendant refused to sell him beer. But honestly though, those corn dog sticks are no joke! Continue reading “Man Attacks Gas Station Clerk with Hot Dogs and a Corn Dog Stick”

Woman Hits Ex-Boyfriend In The Face With a Frying Pan

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. I believe that’s the old adage. We can ammend it here, though. How about “hell hath no fury like a woman who can wind up and swing a frying pan like she’s David Ortiz”? This could be the very definition of “baby mama drama”. Continue reading “Woman Hits Ex-Boyfriend In The Face With a Frying Pan”

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Woman Made Payments on BMW With Dead Grandparent’s Social Security Benefits

Gone are the days that I would get a birthday card from my grandparents with a nice note and maybe $10. I’m sure Myriam had a similar experience. The only difference is that after my grandparents passed on, I didn’t impose my own form of restitution by collecting their Social Security benefits.

Maybe I’m the asshole? Continue reading “Woman Made Payments on BMW With Dead Grandparent’s Social Security Benefits”

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Man Accused of Beating Toddler, Putting Her in Oven, Turns Himself In

There’s a special place in Hell for assholes like this guy. In fact, calling him an asshole doesn’t even seem justified. I mean, I call my dog an asshole when he does something stupid. I don’t know there is a word in the English dictionary to describe this scum bag. Continue reading “Man Accused of Beating Toddler, Putting Her in Oven, Turns Himself In”