SAUSAGES ARE FULL OF LOVE. YOU DO NOT USE SAUSAGES TO HURT PEOPLE.
Ya know, when you’re a 22-year-old guy living at home with your moms and she tells you to wait a few minutes when you ask her to make you some food, you should probably respond by telling her to take her time. Or something of that nature.
Because when you’re still depending on your mother for delicious breakfast meats at 22-years-old, there is a problem there and it is a You-Problem. Continue reading “Mother Takes Too Long to Make Food, Gets Assaulted with Sausages”
Maybe he was bluffing? Well, the cops called his bluff.
After spinning out while trying to pass a police officer, hitting the cruiser, and then continuing on his way, this gentleman told police officers that he would “take any test you have” to prove that he wasn’t drunk. His breathalyzer reading came out more than three times the legal limit at .233. He also claims “he ain’t never had a license”. Continue reading “Man Offers to Take Any Test To Prove He Isn’t Drunk, Blows a .233”
Well, the fact that this incident involves a motorcycle and it’s currently snowing in northeast Ohio, determining which state is responsible for this asshole should pretty much be a layup.
However, if you’re still not sure after watching the video and checking out the story, feel free to take the quiz. Hell, take it any way. It’s Monday, we could all use a win.
Law enforcement is searching for a driver involved in a terrible road rage incident on Sunday evening. Continue reading “Driver Runs Motorcycle Off the Road in Road Rage Incident Caught On Camera”
Holy smokes. .316?! I think they told me in college that .400 can blind you and .500 is dead.
Maybe that was Fake News, but I never bothered to test it out. Continue reading “Mugshot Of Man With BAC of .316 Is Exactly What You Think It Would Be”
Man oh man. Have you ever went to pick up a friend at night and they go to get into your car but the door is locked, so you fumble around trying to find the unlock button? It usually takes a few seconds, and your friend thinks you’re trying to be cute and they annoyingly knock on the window like you don’t actually see them standing there trying to get into the car.
ANYWAY. The point of that is that you usually find your way to the unlock button. Continue reading “Woman Breaks Into Car to Sleep, Sets it on Fire, Can’t Find Unlock Button”
Sometimes you just have to fall on Mercy Street and hope the cop will give you a warning or a break. The cop will ask if you’ve been drinking, and you decide to be honest and tell them you’ve had a few, but you’re almost home…yada yada yada. And sometimes, this actually works. Continue reading ““I’m Way Too Drunk to do Any of That Walking!” Man Respectfully Declines Field Sobriety Test”
This video is downright amazing. I don’t even care that you can clearly see this in Florida, thus making the Florida or Ohio question a non-factor. Continue reading “VIDEO: Hit and Run Driver Stopped By Man With a Sledge Hammer”
Gone are the days that I would get a birthday card from my grandparents with a nice note and maybe $10. I’m sure Myriam had a similar experience. The only difference is that after my grandparents passed on, I didn’t impose my own form of restitution by collecting their Social Security benefits.
Maybe I’m the asshole? Continue reading “Woman Made Payments on BMW With Dead Grandparent’s Social Security Benefits”