SAUSAGES ARE FULL OF LOVE. YOU DO NOT USE SAUSAGES TO HURT PEOPLE.
Ya know, when you’re a 22-year-old guy living at home with your moms and she tells you to wait a few minutes when you ask her to make you some food, you should probably respond by telling her to take her time. Or something of that nature.
Because when you’re still depending on your mother for delicious breakfast meats at 22-years-old, there is a problem there and it is a You-Problem. Continue reading “Mother Takes Too Long to Make Food, Gets Assaulted with Sausages”
Normally, bat shit crazy stuff like going after your children with power tools is reserved for those residing in either Florida or Ohio. However, last week a gentleman in Tennessee had enough of his sons shit and pulled out the chainsaw and went after him.
When the son saw the dad coming, the weapon he chose for this battle royale was the lawnmower. The lawnmower won. Continue reading “Florida and Ohio Sit in Awe as Tennessee Dad Goes After Son with Chainsaw, Loses Leg After Son Runs Him Over With Lawnmower”
If you’re down with flashing your giblets, you can be like the ordinary freak show and head to your local park or store parking lot.
If you’re more of a home body freak show, you can do the easy thing and just wait for your neighbors to exit their house and then start the show. You never even have to leave your living room. Maybe this guy is revolutionizing the twig and berry peep show? Continue reading “Man Waits For Neighbor to Come Outside Before Flashing Genitals”
There are total pieces of shit in this world and then there is this woman. 44-years-old should be old enough to know a few things.
- Drinking and driving isn’t smart
- You shouldn’t be drunk before 12pm
- Never smile in a mug shot
Continue reading “Woman All Smiles in Mug Shot Following Fatal Drunk Driving Crash”
What more than one police standoff could make these people feel my pain? I know…TWO POLICE STANDOFFS!
Ebb Duhamel and his face tattoo were threatening people with a gun from inside a home. After many attempts to get him to surrender, the police entered the home only to lose track of Duhamel… Continue reading “Man with ‘Feel My Pain’ Tattoo Captured After Second Standoff”
“I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS MAN IS IN TROUBLE WITH THE POLICE”
– No one ever, probably Continue reading “Man With Hannibal Lecter Face Tattoo Wanted For Burglary”
Dinner and entertainment was denied to a man recently when he refused to stop watching porn on community computers. At a soup kitchen. At 6 am.
Sometime you just have the itch, I guess. Continue reading “Man Refused to Stop Watching Porn at Soup Kitchen”
The police are blaming driver fatigue for the video below, which shows a car barreling toward a turnpike plaza and striking a lane divider at full speed. The driver is ejected and thrown a long distance, but somehow — SOMEHOW — survived the accident. You can also see a passenger emerge from the smoke and fire, a little wobbly on his feet. The other THREE passengers in the car were also OK. All 5 were treated and released from the hospital. Continue reading “VIDEO: Man Ejected From Car During Violent Collision at Turnpike Plaza”
These stories just write themselves sometimes. This young man — while he didn’t act as a cop — is a cop who just so happened to also threaten to kill a woman if she didn’t send him nude photographs.
For good measure, he threatened to kill and/or rape her family members as well.
Because when trying to get those nudes, you can never be too aggressive. Continue reading “Cop Charged After Threatening to Kill Woman If She Didn’t Send Nudes”